>
>   My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked
>   Me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for a moment, and then
>   He asked, "Did you start at 1?"

>   **********

>   After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old
>   Slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the
>   Children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last
>   She threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them
>   Back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the
>   Three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

>   **********

>   A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood
>   Was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a
>   Tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked
>   Wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in.
>   At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

>   **********

>   My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how
>   You and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how
>   Are we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.

>   ***********

>   A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather' s word
>   Processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I
>   Don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

>   ***********

>   I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided
>   To test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She
>   Would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
>   Continued. At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think
>   You should try to figure out some of these yourself!"

>   ***********

>   A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to
>   Discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it
>   Was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take
>   The covers off thy neighbor's wife."

>   ***********

>   Our five-year-old grandson couldn't wait to tell his grandfather about the
>   Movie we had watched on television, "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea." The
>   Scenes with the submarine and the giant octopus had kept him wide-eyed. In
>   The middle of the telling, my husband interrupted Mark, "What caused the
>   Submarine to sink?" With a look of incredulity Mark replied, "Grampa, it
>   Was the 20,000 leaks!!"

>   ************

>   When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights
>   Off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few
>   Fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's
>   No use, Grandpa The mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights. "

>   *************

>   When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not
>   Sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four to
>   Six."

>   *************

>   A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma,
>   Guess what? We learned how to make babies today."
>   The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.
>   "That's interesting, " she said, "How do you make babies?"
>   "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'I' and add 'es'"

>   **************

>   Children's Logic:
>
>   "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy
>   Wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad
>   Aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked.
>   Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a child."

>   *************

>   A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home
>   One day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire
>   Truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties
>   They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.
>   "No, said another, "he's just for good luck." A third child brought the
>   Argument to a close. "They use the dogs", she said firmly, "to find the
>   Fire hydrant."
>